Exactly What They Need

Lately I have been going through a strong period of self-improvement combined at the same time with self-affirmation. Over and over I keep learning that I am enough, I am who God wants me to be. Today was more of that, as you can see in part from the last post. I have also been learning, again, how to relax and leave my problems with God. This seems to be a cyclical process for me, as I've been through these same lessons over, and over, and over in my lifetime. Thankfully God is patient in getting me to where I need to be. I make progress each time and get closer to the end goal each time but it is very much a two steps forward one step back type endeavor. This time around, I have moved past trusting God to help me with things but still worrying about them, to now not even worrying about them, and in doing so have achieved an entirely new level of peace in my life. The peace has really made me feel much more like me than I have in a long time.

Today I was thinking about that on the drive home, and realized something that I think is really important for me. When I am myself, and not trying to be someone other than me or trying to put unreasonable expectations upon myself, or allowing myself to get caught up in anger, hurt, or other emotions, or shutting parts of myself off, when I am totally my true self, I am exactly who my husband and son need for me to be. I am the calm in their lives, the person who they can come to when they are upset or frustrated, talk it out, and leave feeling refreshed. When I am not me, I can not respond to them the way they need me to, and they get frustrated, and I get frustrated, and we all end up upset or irritated with one another.

How refreshing to realize that the best thing I can give my husband and son is to be who I am.

Of course this only makes sense because why would God send me a husband or child that needed me to be someone that I am not?

So to reflect back to an older post, I am perfectly created. I may not always make the right choices, but as long as I am me I am exactly who I need to be, and as long as I stay faithful to Him, it will all work itself out.